blub

A very promising story. I have to admit I did like the thought of Trance being talked into getting revenge against those who raped him and left him for dead and everyone who facilitated the event to occur. Even more I liked what William (The Devil) revealed at the very end and why he had to have Trance. The story was very compelling and unraveled to show readers why Trance was getting his revenge against every individual on his list. Please note: the rape wasn't explicit and mostly off page.

The only reasons the rating isn't higher is because this story is in need of an editor. There are many grammatical mistakes. It really messed with the flow of the story and brought me out of the head space so I could note where the mistakes were. Within the same paragraph and sometimes sentences a contradiction occurs. For example: there was a part in the story where Peter says "I didn't see him for a whole year since he is in coma. I sneak into the hospital to check on him sometimes and then went back home crying...." The first sentence indicates he didn't visit Trance for a year. Then the next indicates he did go visit Trance in that year he was in a coma.

Even saying all that, I liked this story and will probably read another story from this author.